7 Things That Make a Man Sexually Attractive

  What makes us attractive? Is it our appearance, our sexual prowess, our personality, or something else? And how much control do we have over it anyway? Many of us are so scared of being inherently unattractive that we tend to forget just how much we can change in this area. In episode 70 of the Get Sex Smart podcast Dr. Valeria and I talk all about men's sexual attractiveness and make an effort to challenge this defeatist narrative. Drawing inspiration from the theory of erotic capital put forward by sociologist Catherine Hakim, we discuss seven key factors that determine men's (but also anyone's really) sexual attractiveness: physical beauty, liveliness, charm, physical presentation and dressing well, social skills, sex appeal and sexual competence. We also talk about some of the ways in which men can take [...]

By | 2019-04-30T17:49:36+02:00 April 30th, 2019|Podcast|0 Comments

Do Men Need Female Orgasms to Feel More Confident and Masculine?

It is all too common for straight men to look to their female partners to make them feel more secure and safe in their masculinity in the bedroom. For instance, according to a recent study in the Journal of Sex Research, many men seem to treat their female partners’ orgasms as a confidence booster and a way to feel more masculine and successful. While it is understandable that we all want to give pleasure to our partners and feel a rush when seeing them in the throes of passion, having the wrong motivations is a sure path to resentment. So if you ever find yourself hellbent on making your partner orgasm, it might be a good idea to take a step back and consider the reasons behind this drive. To help you in this journey, Dr. [...]

By | 2019-04-08T12:22:55+02:00 April 8th, 2019|Podcast|0 Comments

What Pornhub Reveals About Our Sexual Fantasies

Porn, in one form or another, is as old as humanity itself. But nowadays, thanks to widespread and easy access to free online porn, it can also provide an excellent source of data on what turns us on and why. A study published by the porn website Pornhub, based on 10 years of porn searches, shows that what we like and search for online is a reflection of not only our desires (known or repressed) but is also a product of our surroundings - such as current world issues and what is being discussed in the media. Turns out the relationship between porn and reality goes both ways - porn may affect us and our sex lives but the outside world in turn affects what we look for in porn. In this episode of the Get [...]

By | 2019-03-13T10:53:19+02:00 March 20th, 2019|Podcast|0 Comments

Dating Woes: How Not to Be Creepy

"But what if I come off as creepy?" This is a a common source of anxiety for a lot of people in their dating lives, especially for those of us who are considering  "making the first move" - be it flirting, telling someone we're into them or asking someone out on a first date. This fear can be amplified in the case of men who want to approach women - no one wants to be THAT guy! So what is the definition or essence of creepiness? Is it just a case of social awkwardness gone wrong? And is there any easy way to check if what we're doing will be seen as creepy or does creepiness - like beauty - lie in the eye of the beholder? Dr. Valeria and I will be discussing this and [...]

By | 2019-03-12T18:12:32+02:00 March 13th, 2019|Podcast|0 Comments

Is Physical Attractiveness Important for Sex?

Whenever we talk about intimacy, physical attractiveness and beauty get mentioned as important factors for good sex. Humans are visual creatures, after all, and what we see in the media only reinforces the belief that looks are everything when it comes to sex and relationships. We are all taught what is seen as attractive (in our particular culture) and what is not - and this upbringing is hard to ignore. But just how important are our looks when it comes to creating fulfilling sex lives?  Are you doomed to be single forever if you don't fit the perfect image of what is perceived as attractive? And is what we find attractive a question of nature, nurture, or a bit of both? Dr. Valeria and I sat down to weigh in on this question in Episode 61 [...]

By | 2019-02-27T22:09:55+02:00 February 27th, 2019|Podcast|0 Comments

Faking Orgasms: Why We Do It & How to Stop

  Faking orgasms is a phenomenon that remains extremely current and common - it has after all become a part of our popular culture (looking at you Meg Ryan!). Many of us have had personal experiences with faking orgasm - either as fakers or as their sexual partners (and often both). That is why it is important that we stop and consider how faking orgasms on a regular basis may be affecting us and our sex lives in the long run, what the reasons behind this mechanism are and how we can break the cycle. Tune in for another information-packed episode of the Get Sex Smart Podcast. In Episode 59 Dr. Valeria and I discuss: the data on who fakes orgasms and why (surprise: it's not just heterosexual women) why faking orgasms doesn't pay off in [...]

By | 2019-02-20T01:44:17+02:00 February 20th, 2019|Podcast|0 Comments

Dating Advice That Will Ruin Your Sex Life

Much of the dating advice we come across (both online and offline) these days also involves dealing with the topic of sex and intimacy. Unfortunately, even if we give it the benefit of doubt and assume it is well-intentioned, a lot of the advice we see is inaccurate and can have a lasting negative impact on our relationships and sex life. Advice that is based on myths, false assumptions, harmful gender stereotypes, and general sex-negativity can have a lasting impact on how we approach intimacy and as sex professionals, Dr. Valeria and I often see the result of following this advice in the clients that seek our help. For this reason we recorded an episode where we address five types of problematic dating advice out there and explain why following it not only won’t help you have [...]

By | 2019-02-20T09:24:42+02:00 February 13th, 2019|Podcast|2 Comments

Awesome Anal Sex: 5 Advanced Tips

Did you enjoy our previous episode on the basics of anal sex? If you haven't had a chance to listen to it yet, make sure to check it out first - it's a must-listen for anyone interested in exploring anal pleasure and a great introduction to this episode!Today we're back with a second episode dedicated to anal pleasure. In episode 54 of the Get Sex Smart podcast Dr. Valeria and I share our top 5 advanced tips and techniques that will help you kick things up a notch and get even more fun and pleasure out of your experience. Ready to dig in and take your anal sex skills to the next level?By listening to this episode you will learn: Everything you need to know about annalingus - including hygiene, safety and why it can be [...]

By | 2019-02-05T23:48:49+02:00 February 6th, 2019|Podcast|0 Comments

What to Do When Embarrassing or Weird Stuff Happens During Sex

It's safe to say that sooner or later every sexually active person will experience something weird or embarrassing happen during sex. When we start doing stuff with our bodies, the strange and unexpected can happen - it's just one of those facts of life. What we can do is prepare ourselves for it and learn how to take such situations in stride and ensure that no participant is left feeling ashamed or uncomfortable. Farting, queafing, accidentally damaging objects or injuring your partner - all of these things can and do happen. But why not make feeling mortified about them a thing of the past? In Episode 49 of the Get Sex Smart podcast, Dr. Valeria and I share some of the many things that can happen (and often have happened to us) during sex in an [...]

By | 2019-02-05T23:50:33+02:00 January 30th, 2019|Podcast|0 Comments

Anal Sex: How to Do It Right and Have Fun

In the age of easily accessible internet porn, anal sex has become fairly commonplace. It is no longer considered niche either, as growing numbers of people add it to their bedroom menus. Still the taboos and myths surrounding anal sex continue to persist, making it harder to find reliable information and tips for those of us who want to dip their toe in the world of backdoor pleasures. Since without proper preparation and knowledge anal sex easily turn into an unpleasant experience, we decided to give it some special attention in our Get Sex Smart podcast. In this first episode (of many) dedicated to the art and science of anal sex, Dr. Valeria and I share some general tips and strategies on how to do anal play and anal sex right and have a great experience. [...]

By | 2019-01-23T15:01:21+02:00 January 23rd, 2019|Podcast|0 Comments
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