What makes us attractive? Is it our appearance, our sexual prowess, our personality, or something else? And how much control do we have over it anyway? Many of us are so scared of being inherently unattractive that we tend to forget just how much we can change in this area.
In episode 70 of the Get Sex Smart podcast Dr. Valeria and I talk all about men’s sexual attractiveness and make an effort to challenge this defeatist narrative. Drawing inspiration from the theory of erotic capital put forward by sociologist Catherine Hakim, we discuss seven key factors that determine men’s (but also anyone’s really) sexual attractiveness: physical beauty, liveliness, charm, physical presentation and dressing well, social skills, sex appeal and sexual competence. We also talk about some of the ways in which men can take control of their own sexual attractiveness and increase these factors.
By listening to this episode you will learn:
- all about the concept of erotic capital
- the ways in which erotic capital impacts seemingly unrelated areas of our lives
- what the first step to increasing your own erotic capital is
- the truth behind our tendency to obsess on fixing things that are either difficult or downright impossible to fix
- why you shouldn’t put off making the change and investing in your erotic capital
- which areas of your attractiveness you have the most control over and how to easily improve in them (no dieting or six-pack required!)
- what people mean when they talk about someone being charming
- that charm and sexual competence are both skills you can work on and improve over time
- the difference between how men and women perceive others’ attractiveness
- why working on improving your erotic capital is worthy of your time and effort
If you have any burning questions related to dating, sex, and relationships, don’t forget to share them below!
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